Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy. About the thirteenth time I see it, but if every single one of my friends want to see it with me, it's okay. I just can't focus on it, I'm too tired or excited or full of sugar or something.

Finally, the summer vacation. Unfortunately we didn't get our diplomas/whatever yet, so I can't use it as an excuse to beg money from relatives. Have to wait another week.. I'm really thinking about another piercing, as an reward for good grades, but I'm really not sure yet. Maybe I'll reward myself just by eating another ice cream.

-> another ice cream.

I don't feel so good. And I'm bored. I'm going to meet friends today but I don't feel like it, I just want to crawl back to bed and sleep.

Okay, dad is going to call me soon and pick me up. Blaah. Tomorrow I'm going to visit relatives and stay at their place and... get bored. No net or anything.

I don't feel like anything. Mooooore sleep.

Uah. Where to start.

I moved to my moms place. Money is problem no more :D And we're moving near my school next June, to a bigger appartment so I get my own room. I like living here, in the capital city, although my schooljourneys are much more interesting... Busses come and go (sometimes I just miss it, can't see it's coming and don't realize to stop it..) and I can read and listen to music while sitting there, watching other people..

I spend quite lot of time with my dad. I feel connected to him, I think that we're closer now than ever before. We can talk about everything and we don't really fight anymore (what's to fight about, I don't LIVE there -> I don't make mess, I don't need money for _everything_, just a little bit every now and then :D..).
Yesterday, I was with dad when he had his tattoo done. It's a wolfs head, cover-up for the old heart in the left arm. It's pretty :)
I, also, am getting a tattoo soon. 21.3. :o Scary.

I'm hungry and I'll have to wait till mom gets home. -_- She has eaten all the white bread and I don't feel like dark bread today. (Because at dads place, there's never white and I was there yesterday.. I'm kinda fed up with dark bread. Ungh.)

I play lemmings. Trallallaa.

I hate it when my parents still think me as a little child. Neither of them is willing to give me enough money to live, just because then I wouldn't have to ask for more money every other day. I can't buy food, 'cause I don't know when I will have money again. So I don't have a habit of .. eating. Properly, anyway. When I HAVE money, I tend to buy some snacks or something to get me trough another day. I'm so glad that school food is free.

I really really want to be all on my own. I want to have warm meals at home too. I want to have some kind of plans for me, but I can't. I'm not totally broke, but I have just and just money for few days. No food thought, and no energy to go to the store.. Fucking busses that cost so fucking much.

I just came home. I was at 'home'home, visiting my puppy. Huray! She almost does what I tell her to. :D

In my door, there was a note from my roommate. Oh fuck! "Hi! Your alarm clock has been ringing for days at 2 in the morning and day.. Could you turn it off, it rings for a long time. -(name) :)" Fuckfuckfuck. It IS my alarm clock and it wasn't working when I left (monday, went to visit relatives, tuesday I came home and left almost immeniately to "home" and not until now, thursday, I found this out) so I didn't know. I feel bad about waking roommates up at least for 3 nights in a row. Gosh. :( Bad, bad me.

...Yea. Missed finnish test today, I will get into real trouble about that. I should go to dentist now, because I think I broke my tooth. :O Tomorrow is the english test and.. Oh fuck. Again, problems travel in packs. My feet hurt 'cause of new shoes, I should do millions of things and I'm too tired. I almost fell asleep in a bus. Scared the shit out of me, really.

Gaaah.

I don't know what to think about my relatives. Aunt and grandma live quite near, grandpa and uncle live there too at times. Uncle mostly workweeks, because he works here and his family lives almost the other side of Finland.
So, they live about 2-3 kilometers away from my place, and I spend my time in there. (Watch tv, mostly, 'cause I don't have my own - I'm under aged poor student who lives completely on her parents money, so no tv.) Every time I go there, I am being.. spoiled. Everything is brought straight under my nose, and aunt always asks "Do you want or need something? I can make some food, here this and that and that, wait, I'll give you money..." etc. It's nice, but sometimes I just can't help feeling embarrassed.

Yesterday, I was heading for one special market (cheap one) but in the middle of walking in snow I thought I'd go over relatives place instead. And I got stuck in front of telly :p Aunt made a bed for me and in the morning I was supposed to walk the 1, 5 kilometers to the market, but grandpa drove me there. And waited outside and drove me to home. He would've driven me to school too but I said it's not necessary. Both aunt and grandpa gave me money and stuff. \o/
What bothers me is..

I don't hate my cousin. She's 6 and tolerable for the few days a year I must spend with her. I'm child enough to play princess with her, and artistic enough to draw.. princesses. But she's spoiled. The princess of whole family..
When I showed my aunt this beautiful butterfly necklace my mom bought me from a cruise, her first reaction was "Aww, you must not let (my cousin) see that or somebody will have to go Stockholm to buy her one too!" ... O_o
When we talked about spring and summer, aunt told me that she had bought all kinds of seed "So I can plant pweeetty floowers for (my cousin) to pick up and put behind her ear!" ...Great. If I, as a child, had picked up planted flowers, the reaction wouldn't have been exactly "Aww so cuuute ^__^" ..at all.
I AM your niece too, you know. And although you spoil me as well as her, (just with money and expensive clothes and stuff, instead of toys) I don't appreciate the thought of buying 6-year-old a necklace that cost almost 50 euros, no matter how pretty it is or how much she'd like to have everything I have.

And now crossed my mind even more offensive thing my mom did. Yea, she's a godmother to that bratpricess, but still. I had a pretty fan, which I found in store with much difficulty, and we had almost a like with one of my dearest friends. My cousin saw it, told me it was pretty and next week mom comes to me: "(My cousin) wants that kind of fan too, so I bought this one but it's not completely a like, so could we trade?" O_o the brat hasn't even seen the other fan. So now I have the one mom bought. Just in case - we don't want the princess to be sad.

Yep.

School is almost fine. I almost can manage - just and just. I even have courses done! Something like 5 and all others have.. maybe 16. Blah. And today I had to go to schools office, because in my class schedule there was only one class for next few weeks. Nice. So I was late from the next class, which happened to be swedish and it was the test. The test I couldn't do 'cause I wasn't let in the classroom, 'cause I was late. :P

I don't know what got into me. I'm not at school and these are the last days before tests.. If I fail the test, I'll have NO courses done at all. And here I am. Sitting in front of the computer, loading music and being bored. I didn't even go to my therapy today - maybe that's the reason what makes going to school so difficult to even think about. ...Goddamn I'm laaaazy.

Yeah, my diet. Started on monday and ended tuesday, just because my mom brought me tons of... candy. And chocolate. And the cabbage-onion-tomato -soup wasn't too good either. I still could eat the rest of it and stop this candy-eating hell I've fallen to again. I just don't know what it is, I can eat and eat and eat and I'm never full. No control at all -_-

I did do one thing today. I went to gynecologist. I was scared before she called me in. I usually am, whatever doctor it is I'm going to see. So I sent some textmessages to friends.. But she was nice enough. I just am stupid with this hormone-thing. I don't want them, expect that now I do want them, now I don't, I don't know. :D She at least listened to me and now I'm just trying these pills. Now I can fix my menstrual circle the way I like, up to like ~70 days circle. O_o Hell yeah!! Hopefully with no side-effects.

O_O

I talked with my little bro through msn messenger. And.. Well, he is much cleverer than I thought. Might be because now we can't see each other..

Now I have internet. Bwahahaha! I haven't moved from this chair after it started to work. ..Well, it was only few hours ago. I really should move my ass and go shopping. I think I still need food.

Must-edit: My brother also has cutie-cutie pictures of our dog. :D I want moooore! I'll have to visit "home"-home weekend and play with my baby-puppy. She's so little and cute and lap-dog. (And nobody comes here to claim that 25 kilos isn't lap-doggish size. Pimu fits in my lap so she's lap-dog.)

Yep, I listened to Vege at last post. -_- I'm in the library.

And stopped here just to tell about my lovely welcome home.. There was a fucking half-eaten banana on the kitchen table. Okay, not everyone clean up just after they've eaten, but I hate bananas, their smell and everything, so I wasn't pleased with my roommates. And I just know wicth one of them it was.. Graah. Everything is messy around there, well, not exactly, but every single table has bread crumbles and other stuff on them - hatehatehate. SOMEONE has to wipe them off. Someone who cares.

Blah. Buss is coming and I'm not aloud to be here longer than 15 minutes. I want net! My own interwebb~!

I made a new journal, because some of my friends might want to read these useless words in english, too. So here I go. Funfunfun. Also, I should train my english.. Or I'll never get those courses done.

Currently I'm waiting for my dad to wake up and drive me home (no neeet~! for weeks. Sad.) and give me money. Holidays are over and normal life is starting to stress me already. Tomorrow, school. Have to clean up today, hope I'll remember.. And next week also this "work" starts, I have to deliver those fucking paperadds to peoples home. Sucks big time.

I don't dare to wake him up(, he's always cranky after a nap), or he wont give me money. (Moneyy!) Not that I would need any food, I ate too much Christmas and New Year, but I can't go anywhere without money for the buss.

Maybe I should now pack up everything I brought here. Tons of clothes and christmas presents. Damn. But can't leave them here, either, they're showing this house to new buyers next weekend. Must-get-another-runaway-place-with-net... *dies*

Well. Not a bad beginning but I really need this exercise, I don't make sense in English anymoree! (Did I ever.. ? No matter..)